Roll with the Punches
by Amber Laura
Summary: * Finished!*
1. Surprise!

Hey guys, I know I'm not yet finished with 'I wander as I wonder' but this just came to me!

So I hope you like it!

And we're off

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Harm rolled over and shut off his blaring alarm clock, he groaned. Man he must have really turned the volume up!. He wouldn't be surprised if the neighbor started complaining.

Harm slowly got out of bed and headed for his shower, rubbing his aching head. 

'Wow, this is a massive headache. And I didn't drink a thing yesterday. But man it's bad enough to be a hangover.' He thought to him self.

Harm stepped into the shower. But with the water pouring on his head he wished he hadn't. It had felt like someone was throwing bricks at his head, many times.

After his shower Harm went into his kitchen and made himself a breakfast, then dragged him self to work. The ride there was horrible he was actually getting car-sick. That had never happened to him before. But cars and buildings were swimming in front of him, he gripped the steering wheel and drove carefully to work. Ten minutes later he came to headquarters, to him it felt like ten years!

Harm stepped off the elevator into the bullpen. All of a sudden the desks and people became little blue smudges, and the desks were moving as if they were floating in space. Harm tried to clear his head by shaking it but that only worsened his already horrible headache.

Harm groaned and stepped into his office. The noise in the bullpen was unbearably loud. Harm slammed the door shut in anger only to curse him self as he soon felt like he was standing in human size amps.

He sat down and started, or tried to anyway, to do his work. Mac walked into his room and closed his door, smiling at his apparent anger. When she looked at him she freeze in her place.

" Hey Harm are you alright?" She asked when she saw his face.

He was really pale, and had beads of sweat cloaking his forehead. Harm slowly moved his head up to look at her, and smiled. It was weak.

" Yeah I'm fine, I just have a bad headache," He tried to pass it off as nothing important but he could see that she was worried. So he smiled again, a little bit brighter.

" Okay then, I just came here to remind you that the court time for the Miadson trial was changed. It starts in fifteen minutes," Mac waited for Harm to reply.

Harm inwardly groaned, if only he had a couple more hours. The Advil then would have fully kicked in and his headache would be long gone. He looked at his watch, oh well he'd survived on headaches before.

" Sure okay, I'll be there in just a minute. Is my client here yet?" He asked on after-thought. 

Mac nodded her head, worried at his obviously hesitation at a question that was usually his first. 

She waited until Harm had collected his papers.

Harm was ready to go. He moved his chair back and proceeded to stand up. Only something made this very difficult, he lost his balance.

Harm's leg's collapsed right under him. Harm yelped in surprise and grabbed on to his desk, sending all his papers flying.

Mac rushed over to him, concern written all over her face. " Oh my God, Harm are you alright?" She asked helping Harm up once his legs started responding to him again.

" Yeah Mac I'm fine. Will you help me with my papers?" He asked as they both bent down to pile them back in order.

Ten Minutes Later

" This court in now in order," replied Mac, who kept looking at Harm concerned. Since the accident at his office he only appeared to be getting worse. He face looked limp and balmy and he looked as if he might be having trouble paying attention.

" Petty Officer Henderson isn't it true that *****hiccup that you *hiccup …" Harm couldn't finish talking as the hiccups got worse.

Mac moved her hands towards his picture of water, silently asking him to clear his throat. Harm poured a full glass of water. He started to drink then abruptly dropped his glass. His right arm had gone completely numb, hell the whole right side of his body was becoming numb, his vision had gotten really bad again, especially in his right eye.

Mac stepped down to try and help him but she was too late. Harm slid to the floor unconscious. Mac ran over to him and lightly shook him.

" OH my God Harm, wake up," Mac urged practically hysterical.

Harm slowly comes to but he can't under stand what Mac is saying to him. He try's to ask her. " What," He asked, but they can't understand what he mumbles.

"Harm talk to me," Mac begs as Harm slips off into the unconsciousness again.

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" Come on commander, come back to us. There you go good boy," was the first thing Harm heard when he regained consciousness. 

Harm looked around. He was lying in a bed. And the room was colored in mostly blues and whites. A man was greeting him with a white coat on. And antibodics could most likely be smelled a half a block away. It didn't take much I guess that he was in the hospital.

Harm was looked around again in confusion. Why am I here, What happened to me, Mac? Those thoughts filtered through Harm's mind all at the same time.

Then it came to him. His horrible headache, the lose of sensation in the right side of his body, blacking out. Harm looked up at the doctor suddenly nervous.

" What's wrong with me doc?" He asked, afraid. At the same time he thought that it was weird that Mac wasn't here supporting him like she always did.

" You suffered from a Hemorrhagic stroke, otherwise known as the bleeding stroke," The doctor said, then slipped quietly out of the room to finish with his other patients.

Harm sat there in utter bemusement. A stroke at his age, he was only 37 years old, wasn't that young?

He didn't turn to see Mac standing outside his room, looking in the window.

Dressed in the same clothes as yesterday, with bags under hers eyes and dry tear marks still evident on her face. Mac didn't look to good, but she couldn't face Harm, not yet. She needed to be strong for him, but first she needed to figure out how.

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Okay guys that it for today, I have some researching to do. Oh the life of a writer, lol!

Anyhoo, I want at the very least 5 reviews. But if I get ten, you get two chapters. Sound fair to me, well I guess we'll see!

Until next time! 

Thanks, AL


	2. When the Bough Breaks

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OMG! I can't believe the number or reviews I got! Thank you all so very much, you have all just made my day! PLEASE don't stop, I need them!!!

As I promised you all will get 2 chapters! Wish me luck, for what had started as being a fun little story has turned to homework. And not the easy kind!

And we're off!

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The door squeaked open Harm turned towards the sound a smile on his lips for Mac. Only it wasn't her. It was a nurse, a very manly scary looking nurse. 

Harm shrank back nurses never did anything but cause pain. When she saw this the nurse frowned making her more homely if that were even possible.

" Now don't be such a baby and take the medicine, you have to," She snapped in a rough deep, sort of scratching voice.

Harm looked at her suspiciously" What kind of medicine?" he asked in a paranoid voice. 

The nurse's actually mouth twitched, Harm thought in amazement. Well I'll be, she is actually human. Harm relaxed a little at this new found information.

" It's called thrombolytic agent, or known as TPA, you need it or you don't survive." She replied.

Harm paled, thinking about how easily he could still do that. Die. " Why haven't you given it to me yet!" He yelled at her, panicked.

" Because you were unconscious, or don't you remember?" She asked, distracting him as she shot the needle into him arm, making him wince. " Don't be a baby. Take it like a man it's only a shot." She replied but was given away at the concerned look that ran across her face about a second before she replaced it with a bored expression.

"Thanks," Harm muttered as he once again got cozy in his bed.

" Dr. Macovich, will be with you shortly to talk to you," She replied just before she slipped out of the door.

Harm sat there. He didn't understand, he was young, this wasn't supposed to happen until he was like 60, right? Harm thought about it, and about the day earlier. He thought about his headache and blurry vision, numbness in his arm. And lastly he thought about Mac. 

'Were is she, I would have thought she would be here, if for nothing more than emotional help' Harm thought to him self.

Because Lord knew he needed her right now. He needed to hold her hand. He needed her tell him everything was going to be all right. He needed…

Harm's thought were disrupted when a knock was sounded at his door, followed by Dr. Macovich's entrance.

" Hey Harm, how are you doing?" He asked, sitting down by Harm's bedside.

" What do you think," Harm snapped uncharacteristically.

Dr. Macovich patted his hand, wanting to comfort him, but knowing Harm needed to know it all.

" Harm I'm here to fill you in on your stroke. I figured if I gave you a few hours to let it sink in, you'd be ready to hear what I have to say. So what do you think?" He asked, not wanting to push Harm.

" I want to know Doc."  


Dr. Macovich sighed, then nodded his head. " Like I said you suffered from a Hemorrhagic stroke. Yours was from a weakened blood vessel in your brain that started to leak. That's where the headache's, numbness, and unconsciousness came from." The doctor explained, carefully watching Harm's face.

He hadn't moved, not a muscle he was waiting for the bad news, he knew there had to be some bad news.

" You are actually pretty lucky because yours wasn't a big leak, in which case usually leads to death. Because of that you hadn't had to have emergency operation, another thing to be very thankful about," The doctor put in hoping that would lift Harm's spirits a little.

" So Harm you've got a really good chance of coming out of all of this as normally as you came into it," The doctor ended, again watching Harm's face. It had pinched up a little but other than that he was taking the news pretty good. Not always a great sign.

"Now, your not entirely out of the woods yet. We still have to perform a couple of test to see how your thinking, physical, and independence skill are and how they're doing, see what you will or will not need. We'll start to perform these tests a soon as possible, hopefully even tomorrow."

Harm just stared at him. This can't be happening to me. I know that at any moment I'm going to wake and find this all just a horrible dream. I have to, because I can't, this can't, NO!

"No what, Harm?" The doctor asked.

Harm blushed, he hadn't realized he'd said that out loud. " Nothing I was just talking to myself," he muttered.

" Is there anything you'd like to ask me before I go and do my rounds?" 

Harm looked at him for a couple of seconds then asked very quietly. " Am I going to die?" He needed to know. So that he could square everything away. So he could say his good-byes.

" No Harm, not so long as your under my care," the doctor replied seriously.

Harm smiled. " Getting a little cocky there aren't you doc?" 

Dr. Macovich smiled, it was always a good sign when patient was able to joke. " You bet your ass I am. And you just what and see. I'll be right I always am." He laughed. 

He walked out the door with a smile on his face. 

'I think he's going to be okay.' He thought to himself whistling down the hall to visit a ten-year-old girl who broke racing with a friend down a steep hill.

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Mac quietly slipped into Harm's room. It was late, maybe 7:30. When she looked at Harm she saw that he was soundly sleeping. She gave a small sigh of relief.

She hated herself, she knew that if the roles had been reversed he'd have been there the whole time. And it wasn't as if she didn't want to be there. She just had a hard time coming to the fact that Harm could easily die.

Yeah Harm's gotten himself into tricky situations before. And yes, he's almost died before but this is different. Before it was all by choice. Harm choose to put himself in (no pun intended) harms way. Now it was so controlling, so overpowering. So not fair.

She couldn't lose him, not yet and not to this. Harm was the type of guy who would hate to leave the earth in such a conventional way. He would want to go down guns blazing, so to speak.

But this, it had happened so unexpectedly, it could easily do that again. Mac looked at Harm no she couldn't lose him. But she also knew she couldn't hide from it. If life had taught her anything it was that.

Mac slowly approached Harm's bed, not wanting to wake him. She stopped and just looked at him, pale and… lifeless! 

Mac gasped and rammed her hand over her mouth to stop the sob. She closed her eyes tightly. No, he isn't dead you know he isn't dead. She kept telling herself until she calmed down. She looked at him again and sure enough he was breathing.

Mac lowered herself to the chair by his bedside. She gripped his hand tightly and prayed. 

' God, please don't take him I need him. I love him, and gosh darnit I'm going to fight you tooth and nail for him.' Mac promised furiously!

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~ Okay guys I just wanted to let you all know, that though I did look stuff up, I might be wrong on some of the medical parts of this story. 

If they are wrong just remember ~ this is only fiction, and I'm sorry but I'll try to make it as legit as possible, so please don't get angry at me, if they are.

Okay, done with that lecture, on to chapter two. So now I'll need ten reviews either way before I write another chapter. Have a great weekend.

Until next time

Thanks, AL


	3. Don't Slip

Okay, here we go!

I don't really have anything to say so I'll stop wasting your time

And we're off

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"Mac?" Whispered Harm, a half an hour later. He was groggy and not sure if he was dreaming her up or not.

Mac smiled and squeezed his hand, her own way of comforting him. " Yeah Harm it's me," She whispered back.

" I was wondering when you'd show your face," He teased seeing Mac's tight expression. He didn't want her to worry about him. If anything he wanted her to be strong for him.

Mac looked down at the ground ashamed. She should have been there, that had made her sad. The fact that Harm had wanted her there made her depressed. 

" I know and I'm really sorry. I just thought that you might want a little bit of time for yourself. I know that's no excuse because I would have wanted you here, but quite truthfully, I too had needed some time," Mac whispered, looking into his aqua colored eyes hoping he would understand.

Harm nodded. " But you know you could have come in here and told me, we could have talked," he told her. Surprising both of them, Harm never wanted to talk about things. He either faced them head on or wrote them off as no big deal.

" Well I'm here now, and I'd like to take you up on that," Mac answered with a watery smile. 

" Okay, what do you want to know?"

" Well for starters, what's up. I know you had a stroke but that's all I could get out of those damn doctors." Mac said.

Harm laughed, then sobered up once he saw that Mac was waiting for him to answer her. " I had a bleeding stroke, blood vessel leaked in the brain…" Harm continued on to tell Mac what the doctor had told him.

Mac breathed a sigh of relief. From what the doctor said Harm should be all right. But they still have to take some tests, so Harm told her not to become to hopeful. But Mac couldn't help it, it was the best news she thought she had ever heard

The rest of the time they talked and teased, with lapses of silences in between. Finally at about 8:30 p.m. Harm feel asleep, with Mac's right hand held firmly in his against his chest.

Mac watched him sleep for a while, a smile on her face. Her Harm was going to be okay she felt like finally she could breath. Like she'd been holding her breath since that moment in the courtroom.

A knock sounded at the door and the nurse came in. " I'm sorry ma'am but visiting hours are over, I'm afraid you'll have to leave now," she explained to Mac.

" When can I come back?"

" Visiting hours start at 8:00 a.m.," she replied as she checked over Harm's machines. Mac lightly kissed Harm's forehead and then headed for home. ' This is going to be a long night," she thought to herself.

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Mac walked towards Harms room but stopped suddenly when she heard talking go on in there. At first she had thought it was the Dr. But then she heard a light, yet loud laugh float from the room. 

Mac smiled she'd know that laugh anywhere. Harriet. Mac walked silently into the room, and just watched. She smiled Harm and her were so lucky to have friends like them.

" So then I turned around a bumped into the Secnav's wife, and spilled deep red whine all over her dress. She screamed bloody murder. I thought I was done…" The admiral's voice drifted above her as she watched.

Harm looked a lot better today, his color was back and his beautiful eyes were twinkling. Harriet and Bud looked concerned but tried, though they didn't do a good job of it, not show it.

And the Admiral kept stealing glances at Harm, as if to make sure he was still there, still alive.

Mac finally stepped into the room, wanting to visit and most importantly see how Harm was doing.

" Hey Mac, how's it going?" Harm asked casually, as if he wasn't sitting there in a hospital bed, with worried friends all around him.

Mac laughed, she couldn't help it. Of course Harm would act like that. " Oh I'm doing pretty good, and yourself?" She asked just as casually.

" I'm feeling good, though I have to have some of my tests today. Not really looking forward to that."

" Yeah, what tests?" Mac wondered.

" Today I take the NIH test. That's supposed to tell how my thinking and physical skills are. If I need to work on them etc." Harm wanted to sound confident, but he couldn't. He was a little worried, though he had no problems thinking and remembering things, he could barely move at all. 

" When?" They all asked at the same time, laughing.

" Oh, I don't know, a couple of hours I suppose."

Mac looked at Harm, at a closer look he seemed tired. He had smudges under his eyes and deep lines were etched in his face. Mac's fingers itched to run across it and smoothen out the lines. To heal all his pain, inside or out. But she refrained, not wanting to cause unwanted attention.

They sat around and talked for awhile. The guys swapping storied of past hurts, and embarrassing moments. If Mac had to choose, her favorite one was when Sturgis accidentally went into the wrong 'head' and a woman walked in on him peeing. 

After a couple hours they all got up, having to leave for work. When the Admiral asked her what she was doing, she told him she was taking some of her 35 vacation days off from the book. The Admiral frowned and complained, something about when the Navy goes down Marines get scared and high tail it out, Mac only smiled knowing it was the Admiral's way of saying he was proud.

Harm and Mac talked for a little while, but a half an hour later Harm fell asleep through her story. Mac smiled affectionately down at him. She stood up stretching out the cramps in her legs. Then something hit her. His mom doesn't know!

Mac rushed out of the room and called up Trisha Rabb's number.

" Hello?" Answered a slightly accented woman. Mac smiled, she loved Trish like her own mom.

" Hi Trisha, Its Mac, I have some bad news I'm afraid," Mac told her.

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Mac walked dejectedly back to Harm's room. Trish had taken the news the way Mac had expected, badly. First she'd been to shocked to speak, then she'd denied it. And finally she cried, heart-wrenching cries that had made Mac want to reach over the phone line and hug her.

'Why do bad things happen to good people?' She wondered as she walked over to the coffee machine. She was just about to take a sip of coffee when Dr. Macovich came up to her.

" Hey doc," Mac smiled at him.

" Sarah could I have a word with you in my office for just a moment?" He asked her. Mac was to shocked to speak she just numbly nodded her head. 

'Oh God something's happened," She panicked, a thousand horrible thoughts whirling through her head all at once, making her dizzy and nauseous.

Once Mac was seated on one of the two chairs in front of his desk Dr. Macovich started. " Sarah, I want to warn you that though Harm is alive his life could and probably will change drastically for him. And this sort of news doesn't always come easily to people. Especially those in the Service." He stopped when Mac lit out a sigh of relief.

" Oh Doc you really scared me I thought you were going to say that Harm was going to die or something," Mac announced, a smile on her lips.

" Yes and though it isn't quite that dramatic, this is still very vital. You see, many slip into a deep depression when all of a sudden they can't do things they usually did without thought. And if a person does that it slows sometimes even stops the recovery process.

" So what I ask of you is to try to make him look at things optimistically. And if you think he is becoming depressed, confront me right away."

" Yes, sir!" Mac announced, all traces of her earlier smile gone.

" Now Sarah I don't say this because I see it in Harm. In fact I think Harm is doing very well emotionally. I just want to warn you," He told her seeing the worry in her face.

Mac nodded then left the room. She was going to help him live, nothing was going to stop that. 'Not even if I have to shove 'happy pills' down his throat!' She decided, feeling a little bit better.

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Okay so I hope you like it. As I said in my other chapter I want 10 reviews before I write again, thanks!

Until next time

Thanks, AL


	4. Leave Me Alone!

Hey guys thanks for all the reviews, I hope to keep y'all interested!

And we're off!

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Mac walked into Harm's room thankful that he was still sleeping. She was worried, what if the tests showed that he was handicapped in some way and he got depressed, what if he slowed/stopped his recovery only to have a stroke again and die! Oh God, she had to keep him positive. But how?

Mac sat down by Harm and grabbed his hand tightly needing some of his strength. She looked down on him. 

'Don't you dare die on me Navy,' She silently ordered him.

Mac hadn't known she was tired but the next thing she knew she was being woken up by one of the nurses telling her to go home. Mac slowly got up went home after kissing Harm's forehead and promising him to be back the next day even though he was asleep and couldn't hear her.

When Mac came in the next morning Harm was gone. Mac walked over to the nurses station wondering where Harm had gone, or if they had moved him.

" Ma'am where is Harmon Rabb?" She asked.

" He's with Dr. Macovich right now, doing some tests," She told her, remembering her from yesterday. 

Mac thanked her then deciding that Harm would probably be awhile went out to get some food.

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"Okay Harm I want to ask you a couple of questions," Dr. Macovich told him, sitting in his office.

" Okay," a tired Harm answered. He really didn't want to be here. He was tired and cranky, and very hungry!

" Harm can you tell me about your childhood?" He asked, surprising Harm.

" Yes, why?"

"Just tell me about it. The shortened version," He told him impatiently.

So Harm did. He told him about his father, the war. He's teenage years, what he did in school, sports. Harm was totally confused as to why the doctor wanted to know his whole life story but Harm gave it to him right up until the day of his stroke.

" Okay good Harm. Now I'm going to ask you some Math and Science questions. Lets see if you can answer them for me," Dr. Macovich brought out a notebook and pencil.

So for the next hour and a half Harm answered Math, Science, Grammar, History, even Health questions, all accurately enough.

" Enough! What is this?" Harm finally asked exasperated!

" I'm trying to see how your thinking skills are. How they were affected or in your case not affected," The Dr. calmly explained to him not wanting to upset Harm.

"Okay," Harm said wearily to tired to fight. 

They continued to do this for another hour or two, Harm couldn't be sure just how long, he'd lost count in the sea of boredom.

" Okay Harm we're done. I see nothing in the questions I've asked that have stumped you. You're lucky to be able to still do this you know Harm," he told him, hoping it would help cheer him up if he needed it.

" So I'm free to go?" Harm asked, wanting to go back to his room and sleep for 18 hours.

The Dr. laughed knowing how straining it was to have to answer all these boring questions. He nodded his head. Harm sped out of that room so fast he made it to his room faster then someone who would've walked.

A nurse was already in there prepared to help him get back into his bed. Harm didn't like that but knew he wasn't getting up without some assistance. 

He grumbled and complained but finally he was situated in his comfortable bed, and ready to sleep away the afternoon.

"Harm!" Yelled his mom seconds after he had closed his eyes. Silently he cursed her horrible sense of timing, because he couldn't go to bed now with his mom standing there tears streaming down her face.

" Hey mom," He said.

" Oh God my baby, how are you," She asked rushing over to the chair besides his bed. She grabbed his hand and squeezed as hard Harm actually winced.

" I'm fine mom, it wasn't to bad," he told her, omitting the part about his having a hard time moving. He didn't think it was relevant because hell, he _was _moving and that was better then nothing, right? Plus if he said that to her she'd probably start to cry, and then he'd feel like a real jack-ass.

" Oh I was so worried. When Mac called me with the horrible news I thought, well I thought you were already dead. To tell you the truth the whole was over I kept thinking that you could have died between that time and now. But now I can see you and darling you look great," She gushed over him.

Harm figured it was her way of apologizing for not being here soon enough, for not living close enough. Not that it would have made any difference at all. But you know how mom's are.

"Really mom I'm fine. In fact I just got done with one of my tests, it was about my thinking and remembering skills, well I'll have you know I passed with flying colors," Harm tried again to reassure her.

Trish looked down at Harm. He looked really tired and worn, probably from those tests. " Oh goodness your probably so tired, well I have to go check into my hotel anyway so I'll let you get some sleep. I'll come again around five or six, okay?" She asked, getting up and putting her coat on.

Harm silently thanked God and smiled up at his mom. " That sounds perfect mom, I'll see you then," Harm said kissing her on the check when she bent down toward him. Harm let out a big sigh of relief when she left. Finally sleep, he thought closing his eyes.

*knock, knock

The door swished open and Bud and Harried came in. " Hey commander we thought we'd come to visit you during our lunch hour," Bud told him.

Harm silently groaned, the gods must really have it in for him today. But he smiled and thanked them, telling them to bring up a chair secretly wishing they would get paged and leave.

'Oh God listen to yourself. All these people are going out of their way to see you and all you want them to do is leave. You're a bastard,' Harm reprimanded himself. From then on he gave his full attention to Bud and Harriet, or at least tried to but he really was tired. Laughing at their stories of AJ and the mess he just recently got into. Something about trying to flush their baby-sitters cat down the toilet.

Bud and Harriet left after that, and Harm once again tired to go to sleep. But was yet again interrupted by someone walking in.

" Oh for the love of God just let me sleep!" Harm yelled at whoever it was. He didn't care now that he sounded ungrateful he was crabby and very tired and dammit he wanted to go to sleep.

"Sorry Harm, I'll come back later," Mac told him startled by his angry.

  
" No, Mac wait. I don't care that you're here as long as you let me sleep, please," Harm begged feeling bad for yelling at her.

" Sure Harm," Mac answered, at a closer look she could see the black and blue smudges under he's eyes. 

'Oh poor baby he's probably so tired,' Mac thought and quietly sat down next to Harm and just watched him sleep. He was breathing unsteadily and soft. Mac couldn't resist laying her head on his chest and closing her own eyes. It comforted her to hear he's heartbeat, to know he was alive!

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Hey, I hope I'm not making you mad by 'holding my fiction hostage' until I get reviews but I feel it would be a waste of time to write stories that nobody was reading!

Hope none of you are angry with me! But I would still like my regular 5, please!

Until next time,

Thanks AL


	5. Hold Me Up

Hello everybody, are you ready for another chapter? I hope so because here it is!

And thanks so very much for all those wonderful reviews, I love you all so much!

And We're Off!

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Harm woke up alone, he looked around confused.

' I could have sworn Mac slept with me last night,' he thought to himself. But when he looked around and saw no one there he just shook his head and laughed. ' Try wishful thinking, buddy,' he teased himself.

The door opened and in walked Mrs. Man nurse. Harm groaned he hated nurses!

" How's our little soldier today?" She asked in a mother to child voice that she had earlier learned Harm hated. Every time she saw Harm she used that voice.

" Well now I'm just great and how are you?" He asked pasting a smile on his face.

" Well I had a good BM this morning so I suppose that makes it pretty good so far," She teased him watching his face turn from a neutral expression to one of utter disgust.

" That was way to much information, thanks," he muttered, he really hated nurses.

Harm decided against talking to her for the rest of her visit as she checked him over like she did everyday. 

" Your looking good, and you have some color back in you cheeks that's always a plus," She informed him once she was finished.

Harm stubbornly kept quiet, he didn't like her, Harm thought self- pityingly. 

" Oh and by the way you have another test today with Dr. Macovich, Barthel Index." She told him heading towards the door.

" Wait, what kind of test is this for?" Harm asked, he wasn't going to walk into the next test like he did the last, blindfolded!

" It's a test to see how you do independently." The nurse sighed, she hadn't wanted to tell him that. She knew Harm was having troubles with his mobility. And she didn't want to worry or depress him.

" Great," Harm muttered under his breath. But the nurse still heard him.

The nurse walked back into the room and sat in a chair by Harm. " You can move, right?" She asked him.

" A little," he answered vaguely.

" A little means that if you try really hard, do your physical therapy you _can _walk, run, skip, etc again," She told him. She needed him to understand that all was not lost. And what she said was true, but it was going to be painful and hard.

" I will," Harm told her with such conviction in his voice she actually smiled. And she wasn't manly at all when she smiled, she was beautiful. 

" Good, I'm proud of you," She told him, surprising him speechless, a great feet when encountering Harmon Rabb Jr.

The nurse patted his hand and walked out of the room. 'Thank you God for giving him will, determination, even just the stubbornness, whatever it is that will keep him going,' the nurse silently prayed.

She might seem like she didn't care, but she'd just learned after 26 years of watching patients die, or worse live on the outside but be dead in the soul, not to show that pain, and compassion. But still after 26 years she prayed for those patients who always in some way or another ended up in the hospital in her ward.

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Mac walked into Harm's room and again he wasn't there. This time though Mac already knew where he was, another test. She'd talked to the doctor about it the day before.

The Dr. told her to be watchful of Harm and his moods so every afternoon Mac would report to him on how Harm was doing. The only bad thing she'd had to say so far was that yesterday he'd been very crabby. But the doctor told her to expect that especially while they were doing tests.

He said some were boring and long which would make him crabby but it was the difficult possibly even impossible ones that made patients depressed.

Mac was having none of that! She would just have to keep things on the up and up and then Harm could get better. And she could breath again without the horrible pain that was always hitting her in the stomach!

Mac sat down in the chair besides Harm bed and waited for him. Knowing it would be awhile yet she brought the newest issue of People magazine to occupy her time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Harm sat in his wheelchair listening to Dr. Macovich's instructions. Harm didn't know which he wanted to do more laugh or cry. All the doc was going to have Harm do was stand up from his chair.

It looked easy but Harm knew it was going to take a lot out of him.

" Okay now lets see you try," Dr. Macovich told him. But just looking at Harm's face the Doc's fears were confirmed, he wasn't walking well.

Harm gripped the sides of his wheelchair so hard his knuckles turned white. He pushed down hard and tried to make it up, but he couldn't, Harm swore, shook his head, he was going to do it. 

Harm tired again and this time was able to at least get off the chair but only by a couple inches.

"Dammit, I know I can do this just give me a second," He said harshly to the doctor annoyed that he couldn't get up.

So Harm tried again and was able to make it about half way up, but then he lost his grip and fell, to the floor. Harm banged his fists to the ground in anger, he'd known it was going to be hard, but this, this was impossible. 

How was he ever going to walk again much less run.

"Okay Harm lets try something else," the doctor commented seeing Harm inner along with outer struggles at getting up.

"No!" Harm yelled, he was determined that by the end of this test he would get up. The doctor sighed and walked over to calmly get Harm back up in his chair. 

'At least he's trying,' The Dr. told himself

And so Harm tired again, putting so much energy into getting up his face was turning red and the veins at his temples were sticking out. But he couldn't do it, Harm muttered something under his breath but tried it yet again.

Again he fell, his hands were too slick from all the sweat of trying to get up. But this time when Harm fell he hit his head on the wheelchair.

" Okay Harm enough of that exercise, we'll see how your arms are," The Dr. ordered helping a sweaty, panting Harm back up into his chair.

" Fine!" Harm yelled angry that he couldn't do it. No, anger wasn't a strong enough emotion, he was outraged!

The Doctor wheeled Harm over to a table. On it were a bunch of little knick-knacks. He sat down in a chair then proceed to pick everything up then put it back in the same spot.

" Okay your turn," The Dr. said.

It took him awhile but Harm was able to finish this exercise, picking up the objects wasn't to hard. It was keeping them in his hands and putting them back in the same place that was the hardest, because his hands were shaking so badly.

" Harm I think I'll try this test on you again at a later date because the shaking in your hands could also be from how hard your working, the adrenaline that's pumping." The Dr. wanted Harm to know that it was going to get better but the defeated look on Harm's face told him that wasn't going to happen today.

" Why don't you go back to your room now, we're done for the day," He told Harm. 

He didn't want to work him too hard. But witnessing what he'd just seen today, it was Harm who had to stop pushing. If you push too much it sets you back.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Harm made it to his room, depressed at the thought of the nurse who had yet to come it that had to help him get into bed.

He wanted to scream and yell. This wasn't supposed to happen to him he was still young! Harm sat there and enjoyed his little pity-party until the nurse came and helped him into to bed.

If Harm was anything it was stubborn, and he was bound and determined to walk again, to run again. Those were his last thoughts before he succumbed to a deep sleep.

Trish and AJ watched him from the window, Trish quietly crying.

" Did you see his face, he looked so lifeless, so tired," She told AJ. She hated seeing her little boy that way, she'd never seen him look that way, not even when Harmon Sr. was reported missing.

AJ wrapped his arm around her shoulder trying to comfort her, he too was worried Harm was like a son to him and he couldn't help feeling guilty.

' Maybe if I hadn't given him such a heavy work load, made him take a vacation,' he thought to himself feeling gulty beyond compare.

" He's going to be okay Trish, I'll make sure of it," he told her squeezing her shoulder lightly.

' God, please let him be okay,' Both AJ and Trish prayed at the same time, heads slightly bowed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wow what a dramatic ending, huh! Lol

Anyhoo I have to go Subway's a waiting, see how good I am to you. I sacrifice my hunger to entertain you, lol!

Until next time

Thanks, AL


	6. I Won't Let You Go!

Hey All, I'm suffering a little from writers block, so if this chapter is more fluff than anything else please for give me. I'll make sure to add some H/M to make it all better!

And We're Off!

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Mac walked into Harm's room and looked confusedly at his bed. He was in it. She'dhad only be gone for a minute, nature calls. But when she'd left he's still be at his tests!

She shrugged her shoulders and came all the way into the room. She looked down to see Harm sound asleep. Mac smiled softly. They'd told her today that the independence test would most likely ware him out completely.

Mac didn't mind it's not as if she was there solely for the company. Besides she was pretty sure she'd seen the Admiral and Harm's mom not to long ago.

She sat in her now usual chair and brought out her magazine again.

" Oh I see how it is, that magazine's more interesting than I am," Harm voice rang in her ear so suddenly Mac jumped slightly out of her sit.

" Jeez Harm you scared me," Mac told him holding her hand up to her rapidly beating heart.

Instead of pouting or being mock angry Harm just smiled that big toothy smile that Mac had long ago fallen in love with.

" Sorry," He said but there wasn't a sad, or self-disgusted note in his voice. Mac swatted him with her magazine and smiled down at him.

" You should be, I'm sacrificing my vacation time for you," she playfully reminded him. But as soon as the words were out Mac regretted them. And from the look on Harm's face she was about to regret it even more.

" Yeah Mac about that. I appreciate what you doing, being my best friend and all. But I can't let you waste all that time on me. I'm not worth all that hard won time." He was serious.

Mac's laughing smile stopped, and her brows scrunched together.

" Are you trying to tell me that you're not worth me time! Are you telling me that were the roles reversed you wouldn't be here right now! Are you telling me you think some weekend in the Bahamas is more suitable then sitting here with you! Are you insinuating I'm doing this out of charity!" Mac exploded. She couldn't believe what he'd just said.

Harm looked confused, then angry then exhausted all in the span of a few seconds. But he never did say anything.

" Because let me tell you something Mr. Rabb if you are implying all those things I said you don't know me at all!" She finished!

How dared he accuse her of not wanting to be by his side in a time of need! Hell she'd have been by his side if all he'd done was sprained an ankle. And not out of damn charity, because she would've wanted to help!

Harm opened his mouth then closed it, looking rather shocked. Mac wasn't having any of this.

" So are you telling me that when I need you your only their our of obligation?" she deliberately provoked him.

Harm sat straight in his bed at this, now his brows forming together. 

"What? You know that isn't true! I'd be there because I'd want to help you. You're my best friend, I'd be there with you for and through anything and you know it dammit!" Now he was yelling.

Now that Mac had had time to cool down she realized this probably wasn't heathy for Harm to be doing. So this time she calmly answered. " Yes, I do know. And I thought that you knew I felt exactly the same way. But even if you don't it'll take a lot of people and yelling to get me out of this room," she told me. 

She grabbed his hand and squeezed tightly, and small smile on her face now. After a second Harm squeezed back.

" I'm sorry Mac I hadn't said that to offend you. I would just hate for you to waste your time sitting here with a man that's totally fine, and almost fully recovered," He told her putting a happy look on his face for her

Mac smiled but she knew. She knew he wasn't walking, that he was barely even moving. She could also hear his voice. It took him a little bit more time to speak, was probably harder too, a stranger wouldn't notice a thing, heck she wasn't sure Harriet would even notice, but she did.

Then again Mac had worked side by side with Harm for many years, she could tell what kind of mood he was just be the way he carried his arms.

You see, if Harm was in a bad mood he folded them tightly across his waist. If he was concentrating on something then he usually held them together behind his back. If he was super excited about something he was always moving them. Left, right, up, down, always.

Mac smiled now she really did sound like a married woman. But Mac would guess her and Harm knew more about each other then a lot of married couple's do.

" Hello! Earth to Mac," 

Mac jumped at the sight of a hand moving up and down in front of her eyes.

" Where were you just then?" He teased a big smile on his face. Mac shook her head and smiled softly.

" You'll never know," She whispered into his ear then leaned back smiling at Harm disappointed look. 

' Yeah like I'm going to tell you that I was thinking about how wonderful it would be if you were my husband. That I was imagining our little kids running around outside with a big dog chasing after them as they scream and giggle for their hero dad to save them," She thought. She didn't even realize that she'd picked up her left hand and started staring at her third finger.

As if wishing a ring would all of a sudden appear and her dream would be real.

She didn't see this but Harm did, he frowned at the thought of Mac getting serious with somebody else. 

'God is she waiting for 'him' to porpose to her so 'he' can take her away from Jag? Away from me!' Harm wondered as seriously painful spasmism shot up and down his chest causing his face to twist up.

Mac jumped up and reached over the railing. " Oh my God Harm are you alright?" She asked fear clouding her eyes of everything but him.

Harm slowly nodded his head, trying to catch his breath.

" I'm fine Mac seriously I was just thinking about some horrible medicine I have take later today, its the grossest stuff," Harm made up the lie easily, wanting to reassure Mac.

Because he couldn't deal with her on top of himself, because he just realized something that had been sitting in front of him for some time now.

__

Harm was in love with Mac!

" Okay," Mac agreed, with obvious hesitation in her face. But either way she sat back down by his bed. Harm breathed a silent sigh of relief. 

'Glad that's done with now all I have to do is come up with a solution to my feeling for Sarah!'

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

" You know what Irene, I think he's going to make it," Dr. Macovich told Harm's nurse.

She pursed her lips and snorted in a most unlady-like fashion. " And you know why of course," She prosumed.

The Dr. looked at her oddly. 

' What?' He looked in the room. The reason was because he was a fighter, and stoubborn and above all really lucky.

When the Dr. kept quiet Irene laughed.

' I guess I forgot that even though he is the smartest man I have ever personally met, he is still a man.'

She rolled her eyes at him. " He's going to make it because he has her love. Her support, he plain and simply has her," She couldn't keep the romantic part of her from creeping out!

The Dr. gave her the funny look this time and shook his head.

'Woman, they have to romantize everything thing. And if they're not doing that they're dramatizing evrything,' he thought rather clinically.

" I know what you're thinking but let me tell you when I walk into that room and he's alone, he's crabby, and uncooporative. But when she's in there he's happy, colorful, and nice. She brings out the very best in that man. I expect that it works both ways. 

" Seeing the look on her face when he was brought in. She was devastated, like her whole world had just been ripped out. And yes I see that a lot being a nurse. But no, I rarely ever see that being a nurse for Marines," she told him.

She wanted him to understand that he needed to keep her there. That Harm was going to try harder knowing he had a reason too. And though they weren't together, it wasn't hard at all to see their love for one another. 

Irene smiled softly, she had taken an instant liking to that boy, and she'd be damned if she'd let him die, in any way!

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Okey dokey!

Hope you enjoyed! 

Until next time

Thanks, AL


	7. I Don't Like You Anymore

Hey guys I'm back! Sorry if I've been taking a long time to write but I'm currently doing two stories, homework, and having a life! LOL, I wish!

But enough of that, on with the story!

And We're Off!

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__

Almost two whole weeks, and finally I'm free! 

Harm smiled, thinking to himself that once Mac got her bony butt over to the hospital he was free to go! Harm's smile got bigger.

Mac had offered to stay with him, help him along. At first he'd shunned the idea hating the thought of being helpless. But the more he'd thought about it the wiser it had become. 

Though Harm _was _getting stronger he still wasn't walking. And having Mac around to help him would save his energy and time. Not to mention the fact that he would be stealing more hours with her!

Harm's smiled faded a little. She was going to be a hard-ass about getting his home therapy done. Along with his physical therapy that he was going to be taking at a nearby clinic! 

They said that if Harm worked hard in both areas he'd be as good as new before long. Mac took them to heart! Harm groaned now, she was probably going to be worse then Nurse Irene.

Harm laughed quietly, he secretly loved Irene like a mother. She was stern and harsh but she was so giving and helping. And she'd never stopped believing in him, whether he knew at the time or not.

'Dammit, Mac hurry up!' Harm thought exasperated, tapping his foot impatiently to the ground. The sooner he got out of this hell whole the better.

Harm had already signed all the forms, gotten dressed - with a little bit of help from Irene- and was waiting as patiently as he could. Which wasn't much. 

But hell, who would when they had to wait in a wheelchair that made them feel more crippled every second, and with every sympathetic look that passer-bys shot him.

The doors banged open just then and in walked a flustered looking Mac. When she saw Harm ready and waiting she did the most amazing thing. She blushed.

Mac lengthened she stride until she was side by side with Harm.

" I'm so sorry but I got caught up in traffic. Are you ready to got?" She teased. She'd heard nothing the past week but about how much he resented hospitals, and how much he wanted, needed to go home.

" Yes ma'am," Harm mock-saluted her, a goofy grin spread across his face.

Mac secretly smiled herself. She was glad to see the old Harm back. Though Harm hadn't become depressed, or really moody for that matter, he hadn't smiled as much or laughed. That had worried Mac, she was glad now to see a 'real' smile on his face.

Mac walked in back of Harm and started wheeling him out of the hospital towards the Admirals SUV.

" What? Why are we taking the Admiral's vehicle?" Harm asked. Mac smiled even in his condition he had wanted to ride around in her Corvette.

She rolled her eyes affectionately, that was her Harm.

" Because Harm the wheelchair wasn't going to fit in my car. The Admiral was nice enough to loan us his car. So stop complaining and be grateful," Mac teased, using the only defense she had against showing how fearful she was.

When Harm had been in the hospital there had been doctors there to take care of him if anything happened. Now that was up to her.

" I'm sorry Harm, but you get what you get," Mac told him lightly squeezing his shoulder.

" No Mac your right, I was being ungrateful and you guys have all been so supportive, thank you," Harm whispered to her.

Mac maneuvered Harm into the Admiral's car and then they were on their way. 

" Okay Harm we're here," Mac whispered gently shaking a now sleeping Harm.

" Umm… okay Mac," He whispered. 

Because Harm was tired and not paying attention it took them an extra five minutes to get into his apartment. Once there Mac deposited Harm on the couch.

" What would you like for dinner, Harm?" She asked opening up freshly stocked cabinet doors.

" Oh, I think a salad will suffice," He told her, leaning his head back against the couch cushion.

" If you fall asleep you're staying there throughout the night," Mac warned him shaking a mock angry finger at him.

" Okay, no sleeping," Harm agreed picking up a Men's Magazine. Something on body training, Mac smiled it was easy to forget that though Harm was a lawyer and of the more serious nature his was still a Macho Man at heart.

" Okay Harm, you'll have your salad in a matter of minutes," Mac called, scooping up lettuce, tomatoes, cheese, onions and others rather negligently into a big white bowl.

She decided that she too would have a salad. Once the plates and beverages where on the table Mac helped Harm onto his wheelchair and they sat down to eat.

" So here is how we are going to start your day tomorrow…" Mac started interrupted by an annoyed sound coming from Harm's throat.

" What?" She asked confused.

" Look Mac this is a nice dinner I just got back lets please not talk about more exercises I have to do. At least not right now," Harm told her in a strained voice.

" Oh alright, what should we talk about?" Mac asked embarrassed.

" How about when I'm going back to work," Harm knew he was starting a fight but all of a sudden he had a desire to do so, especially with Mac.

Mac sighed, she knew that Harm was going to bring the topic up she just hadn't figured him to be so quick about it.

" Harm, you have to crawl before you can walk. You have to heal first then you can go back to work," Mac tried to sound upbeat but she knew Harm was angry and that it wouldn't matter if she sang it to him, he didn't want to hear those words.

" Dammit Mac I can still work, I could do paper work. Or I could partner with you and have you do the courtroom fights. And not to mention that fact that I can get around in a wheelchair, so I should be able to do the courtroom battling anyway!" Harm fumed. He knew he wasn't being fair to Mac but he didn't care. 

He was angry and she was the only person in the room. The only person who would forgive him for hating her for no reason at all.

" I know that Harm, and my bet is you'll be back at work before you're walking but you have to be patient. Show us just how badly you want to come back to work. Get better for us!"

" I will," And that was it, conversations were over the rest of the evening was confronted with silence. They only time Harm even spoke was to wish Mac goodnight after she'd helped him get into bed.

" Goodnight, Harm," She whispered, he was already asleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

" Wake up sleepy head," 

" Umm…" Harm mumbled and rolled over, but ran into something. He slowly opened his eyes and stared into Mac's bright brown ones.

" You need to get up," she smiled for him, even thought Harm didn't think he deserved it.

" Alright," Harm muttered, slowly getting into his wheelchair. 

He got to the bathroom and had to sit through the most embarrassing moment of his entire adult life. As sponge bath given by Mac. 

When that hell was finally over Harm and Mac sat down for some breakfast.

" Look Mac I want to apologize for the things I said to you yesterday. I know that it isn't your fault, any of it. In fact you've been helping me out tremendously. I was cranky and I lashed out at you, please forgive me," Harm's face was on fire.

He hated admitting he'd done something wrong. He couldn't even look at Mac. But he didn't have to she lightly put her hand upon his.

" I know Harm and it's okay, I wasn't in a good mood yesterday either. And I can't imagine what you must be going through, of course if forgive you," she smiled at him when he finally had the courage to raise his head.

'I must be the luckiest SOB alive' Harm thought a small smile playing on his lips.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Okay I'm beat again I'm up late and I have to be up early!

I seem to do this wrong, oh well!

Until next time

Thanks, AL


	8. When It's All Been Said and Done!

Okay Guys I'm back sorry for being so late but I'm currently doing 3 storied - not very bright, I know! 

Anyhoo I'll quite wasting your time, on with the story

And we're off!

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For the next three hours Harm and Mac exercised. They worked on stretching, reaching, stability. By the time they were done working out Harm felt like he'd just run a Marathon! He was sweating and panting and swaying on his feet.

Mac quickly brought him over to the couch to relax! She sat down with him making him growl seeing that she wasn't breathing heavily, she hadn't even broken out in a sweat. In fact she looked like she hadn't done anything at all.

It made Harm angry to realize that a month ago he'd've been in the same shape, but now getting out of bed was pure hell. Walking around was usually a job that Mac did now if and when he needed something.

" I see someone's in good shape," he snapped instantly regretted it when Mac's smiled disappeared. " Oh hell Mac I'm sorry that was immature and way out of line," Harm pleaded with her. He didn't know what was wrong with himself he was always snapping at her. She was the only person who'd been continually by his side and he was yelling and screaming at her.

" It's okay Harm," Mac reassured him. She too was confused by Harm mood swings, never before had Harm yelled at her for no reason at all. In fact Harm rarely yelled at her when she _did _do something wrong. 

But seeing his disgusted face, all directed at him she squeezed his thigh letting him know that he was forgiven. She wanted to help him and if in doing so she got yelled at then so be it. It would take a lot more than mean words to slow her down.

" Let's get something to eat, I know I'm hungry!" Mac enthused! She jumped up and headed towards Harms cabinets digging around for something easy to make. She spotted some Chicken Noodle soup and grabbed it.

She figured that even in the grumpy mood he was in, Harm couldn't resist a nice warm bowl of Chicken Noodle soup.

She turned around and yelped in surprise when she banged into Harm.

" What are you doing, you need to rest!" Mac yelled, worried for him. He was making progress, but slowly and she didn't want him to over push himself.

Harm silenced her though by grabbing both her wrists. He smiled slightly at her confused, surprised expression. He probably would've been surprised too in her case. He wasn't usually the toucher of the two. Usually that was her department.

" Mac I don't know what I can ever do to repay you for the kindness your showing me now," He whispered to her, driven by such deep emotion he felt like he might drown. So he did something very unlike him. He went on impulse, he decided to talk to her straight for once.

Mac smiled softly. " You can pay me back by staying alive, you can't leave me, not yet," she told him confused by his sudden mood swing, again.

" I can do that, but on one condition," He told her. Mac looked up at him confused, what was he talking about, condition?

" Condition?" Mac voiced her thoughts.

" Well yes, you want me to stay with you, right? Well then we have to get married I won't live with you otherwise," Harm told her, smilingly at the shocked expression on her face. 

He knew he was purposely mixing around what she'd told him but damn if almost dying hadn't made him see the light. Yes Sarah might reject him, but at least he'll know, at least she'll know. He didn't want to die with any regrets if God choose to have him pass early in life. And he knew not telling Sarah he loved her would be the one and only!

"I uh…" Mac didn't know what to say, she wasn't sure if he was joking with her or not.

Harm dashed away that thought when he slowly and unsteadily got down on one knee.

" Sarah I know we've never been anything more than friends, that we've never made that leap. But lying there in that hospital bed I realized something real quick. I love you! I've made it out of tricky situations before but this one was one that was unexpected and out of my control. I realized that if I was going to do anything when I made it out, I was going to do all the things I'd been too afraid to do before.

Harm looked at Mac to see tears glistening in her eyes. He figured that was a good sign so he kept on going.

" The first and foremost was to tell you how much I love you. You are like water to my flower, sun to my sky, the laughter in my voice, and everything bright in my life. I figured that those words were to simple, I want you _see_ what I feel for you. So do me the biggest honor by becoming Mrs. Harmon Rabb and have beautiful babies with me," Harm finished.

By now Mac had tears streaming down her face. She opened her mouth but no sound comes out. She closed it and tried again with the same results.

So she settled for nodding her head and throwing her arms around his neck kissing him soundly on the lips, sealing the deal. Harm held her tight, or at least as tight as he was capable of.

" I love you Harm," she whispered into his neck.

" Oh how long I've waited to hear those words, He breathed out laughing softly.

" It will be a struggle though, and I can't promise to be the greatest husband in the world, but I will try Sarah, I will," he promised looking her deep into her eyes.

" You just by the Harm I fell in love with. And I don't care if there are struggles I love you Harm and we'll work through them, together," She told him smiling softly.

" Together," he repeated just before his mouth retreated down to hers, sealing their future!

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Okay that's it I'm done, I hope you all like it!

If you want more or what not tell me

Until next time

Thank, AL


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